Life Right Now

Hello all. Things around our house have been very busy. Between school, work, and all the other life things going on in our world, we haven't had much time to keep in contact with our loved ones.

Shavik is working hard. Lots of overtime and call in's. With this extreme cold, wind, and rain, he is gone early and home late. We appreciate him though for all the time he puts in!

Chloe is doing great! Second year of pre-school and she is learning so much! We can't believe how much she has grown. She amazes us everyday. She is so intelligent and is always listening and watching what we do. It scares us a bit cause we think she knows TOOO MUCH!

I have been working a lot, and doing school. On top of that trying to run a household. I have put off planning the wedding a bit as I have been so caught up in other things. Life has been so busy for me I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. Never thought I would be happy about that though.

We entered a contest in January to win a wedding at the venue we fell in love with, and we didn't win. So we decided to wait until next summer, 2015, to get married. We want to have the time to really plan and save. We have some home improvement projects we want to get started this summer as well.

Its amazing how when I look back on my life over the last 5 years, how much has changed. How much I have changed. I am proud, now, of who I am. It took me quite a bit of searching, learning, and growing to achieve that. It was hard cause I was very hard on myself and didn't give myself credit when due. I didn't think I deserved what I now have. I have a great support system in place with both my family, Shaviks family, and my wonderful friends. I am so lucky!

Hope you all have an amazing week. This is my moms birthday week! YAY! :)

I Met You.

I spent a lot of time searching for affection in shallow spaces. 

I gave people bits of me they didn't deserve and I let myself be hurt, 

because I thought that's what I deserved. 

But once I let go of trying to shove puzzle pieces in places that did not fit, 

once I let go of all the hate I secretly had stored in the gashes that decorate my heart. 

I met you.

 

 

What I wish I could tell people who have lost someone...

Broken Hearts

I know you've lost someone and it hurts. You may have lost them suddenly, unexpectedly. Or perhaps you began losing pieces of them until one day, there was nothing left. You may have known them all your life or you may have barely known them at all. Either way, it is irrelevant -You cannot control the depth of a wound another soul inflicts upon you.

Which is why I am not here to tell you tomorrow is another day. That the sun will go on shining. Or there are plenty of fish in the sea. What I will tell you is this; its okay to be hurting as much as you are. What you are feeling is not only completely valid but necessary - because it makes you so much more human. And though I can't promise it will get better any time soon, I can tell you that it will - eventually. For now, all you can do is take your time. Take all the time you need.

First Comes Love, Then Comes...

It's the beginning of 2014...Crazy! Great things have happened since my last post and I'm so excited to share them with you!

First and foremost,

I'M GETTING MARRIED!

Yes, it's official. December 21, 2013, Shavik proposed and I said yes! Let the wedding planning begin! And of course, it has. I have my wonderful mom just as happy and excited

This year, I have decided to try and focus on blogging more. About anything. It's my way of sharing my life and having people get to know me. I can't wait! Lots of wedding planning ideas I will share and will probably ask for ideas.

Hope you have an amazing day! I will be back soon to share more about my life and whats going on with me day to day. :)

Christmas Time, and quick year recap!

So I have completely slacked on posting more often, which was my goal when I started my blog. Between working, being mom, homemaker, girlfriend, and college student, I have found I have no time. For anything. It's rather upsetting as I have so much stuff I wanna do!

This year has been very crazy. Lots of ups and downs and hard times. I turned 25 in January. Halfway to thirty. (Not gonna lie, I get happier the closer I get to the big 3-0!)

In April, Shavik's very good friend since childhood commited suicide. This was a very traumatic and heartbreaking event for him. He hadn't ever had to expereince something like this before. I didn't know much of what to say other than my heart was breaking for him, and still does. He recently was talking to a friend and I happened to be there. He told him that he never had believe in the term "the one" or that anyone had one particular soulmate until the day that James died. He doesn't think that he would have been able to make it through that without me. He finally was able to understand what I had gone through and why I was the way I was about things, until that day. It took a few days after the tragedy for him to talk to me and when he did, it was filled with love and sadnesss all mixed together. He had to to eat alot of the ideas he had about it before because its not something you can fully understand, until you experince it yourself. My grandparents were in town a few days after that and stopped by, and when I opened the door to them my grandma walked in and went over to him just to hug him. They know that was what he needed at that time. Was just to be loved. It's so sad that this tragedy was what brought us to the point we are at now, but in a strange way I am grateful for it because its something we have both experienced and we can relate. Life isn't always fair, but it know's what we need. And even if the timing sucks, it is always right.

I started working at Dr. Craven's office in August and I love it! Best job in the world. I don't think I could be any happier working anywhere else right now.

Chloe turned 5 in September! Wahoo! She is getting bigger everyday. She's so smart and fun to be around. She can light up any room. I am so lucky for such a fun loving and special kid! She is exactly what I need in my life.

I was able to watch my baby sister marry the man of her dreams at the beginning of November. I am so happy for her and can't wait for her future. (Also can't wait to find out if I am having a neice or nephew!)

Shavik turned 27 in November and went on a fun hunting trip to South Dakota. He had an absolute blast. Was able to shoot 2 deer and 1 coyote over there. He is looking forward to going back again next year.

And that leads us to today. December 17th. I am on Christmas Vacation from work and get to spend the next 1 1/2 weeks hanging out with Chloe! She wants to build a fort today so my living room will become one giant fun room here pretty soon! I am so grateful for my life today. I couldn't ask for much more. I have a wonderful family and good friends who have been so supportive of me.

LIFE IS GOOD!

 Chloes 5th bbirthday. Fishing with her Dad!

Shooting this summer :)

Chelsey's Bridal Shower at Lake Sutherland.

Halloween 2013

Chelsey and Adam's Wedding November 9th, 2013

Shaviks Hunting Trip 2013

Shaviks Hunting Trip 2013

Chloe with her friend Kenzi December 2013

Shavik and I December 2013

She wanted to play dress-up. This was one of many outfits she tried on. December 2013.




Feeling Blue.

Truth.

Life catch up! Can't believe its already November!

I can't believe its already November. This year as been absolutely a journey, but overall wonderful. I've learned so much and changed a lot as a person. I couldn't be more grateful for the person I am now and for the support of everyone for the new opportunities I have been pursing this year. I love everything about my life at this point and don't think I could ask for much more.

The next few months are always my favorite of the year. I love the holidays. Time spent with loved ones and all the festivity's. Its just a great time, plus I love the snow and REALLY hope we actually get some this year. I need a big fat snowman in my yard this year! Plus I am already anticipating getting my decorations up. I'm not sure I can wait much longer. (Christmas might start in November for us this year! LOL!)

I love my job. Very stressful and crazy at almost all times, but its just what I want to be doing right now. I get to finish school, work, and still spend time with my family. Everyday is a little different than the day before. I am extremely busy. I never feel like I get caught up, but that's just the way its going to be for the next 50 years.

Chloe is doing well in her second year of pre-school. She is learning all about her letters and numbers and getting ready for next year. Kindergarten. I cant believe that its coming that fast. I know she will do great. Shes so bright and outgoing and just loves meeting and playing with new people. She goes to a friend of mines during the day while I work. There are a few other kids there for Chlo to play with and she just loves it. Chloe loves spending time with family. She is always so excited to see her Auntie Chelsey and never wants to leave! If she could move in with Chels and Adam, I think she would. :)

In just over a week my baby sister is getting married. And I get to be apart of that. Its a bitter-sweet moment cause I don't want her to grow up anymore and I always feel the need to protect her. That's my job as the oldest. But shes so wonderful and so smart and talented and I know shes doing exactly what she wants to do and I am so happy for her.

Shavik is getting ready for his hunting trip in just over 2 weeks. He is going to South Dakota with a friend for 2 weeks. This is something he has always wanted to do and this year, we were able to make it work for him to go. We have a little family trip planned when he gets home for our Christmas vacation. Cant wait for him to go and have a great time, then get home cause in the over 4 years we have been together, we haven't spent that much time apart. In the 3 years we have lived together, we have only spend a night apart. Never 2 weeks. We have all been realizing that the closer it gets, the more we realize how hard it will be. Mostly for Chlo. She doesn't like to talk about it, she cries when we do. She is going to miss her dad. But this is something he will enjoy so overall, we will all survive! I know it!

Thats us for now. Just work, school, and watching Chloe grow up. One day at a time. I am so grateful for my friends and family and don't think I could ask for much more. Can't wait to spend more time with then the coming months. See you all soon!